1)Where there's sharewhere, there's a crack.
2)I never wanted to be normal, I wanted to be me.
3)It's the best thing since strike-on-all matches!
4)Stupid people reproduce the fastest.
5)I am a chicken refrigerator ornament! (Chick Magnet)
6)I learn and forget something new everyday.
7)I'm unique, just like everybody else.
8)I didn't work this hard to grow up and be under appreciated.
9)I'm not lazy; I'm efficient.
10)On a scale of 3 to 7.5, how would you rate yourself?
11)Brilliance is not one continuous thought, it comes in spurts of inspiration.
12)The pen is easier to lose then the sword.
13)I don't focus on my accomplishments because everyday I surpass my previous ones.
14)The best compliment I ever got: "I bet you're a lot of fun when you're drunk."
15)The poor will never have enough money to buy luxaries and the rich will never have enough time to use them.
16)Life is not only a bitch, it has puppies too.